fallen indeed, now the scent has not only clung but imprinted on my skin. today, i shall shed all the tears that have hardened along with the lump in my throat. i carry the heavy boulders between my shoulder as i dread how each day will pass. with a big block in my heart, i cannot tell for sure whether i have grown cold or restored my lost innocence. i move in caution with caring steps, careful not to crush your heart because of my growing discontent over my capability to trust the world with wide open eyes. i confront my cynicism and jaded youth while you are steadfast with purity and love.
again, i have fallen into the lure. creatures of habit, what does life constitute more than the repetitive pattern of love, betrayal, hope and desperation. they say it never ceases and as you grow old only varies in degree.
are we then wired into the comfort and frustration of repetition? masochist, violent affection waits in the horizon. will i approach it, as i have always done, or for once turn my back to it?
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